WOW!

Now
Then

Wow! I can truly say that a LOT has happened since my last post! I am kind of sad thinking about all that you have missed, with me not posting about every breath I take! No, really, you have missed a TON! My sweetest little sweetheart was born on May 4th of this year. That was a real treat! Well, the having him part is the what I am smartly referring too, although the getting to keep his sweet little face really is a treat! HE is perfect! Perfect, mind you, is a relative term, because if this adorable little ball of joy never sleeps and at the ripe old age of 6 months is still interested in eating ALL the TIME and SLEEPING NEVER! ;) I am really not kidding! He is making his momma old fast! He got me up almost every hour again last night! And, I am a total zombie, because I really don't "use" caffeine often, so I am an ugly mess! UGH!

You know, this will go on record as the most crazed, jumbled, run-on, hard to read, harder to understand post EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVER, but those of you who know me should be used to it by now!

With that said, I have so much more to tell you, but hardly have the time. My little guy keeps me crazy busy and my Meeeeema keeps me even more busy! Hmmm, I don't have a "code name" for my little guy...that will never do! What should we call him? Little Guy...that'll work! He seemed like such a sausage when he was born that we fondly referred to him as The Little Guy. Yep, you know you are fancy when there is a The in your nickname. Well, that, or your parents are total fruitcakes, which may also be the case? No opinion comments, thank you! :)

What else, I must say that writing is exhilarating, although I feel like I am spelling it wrong and NO I won't be hitting spellcheck, for any reason, when this post is complete, because that really isn't who I am! Crazy people don't NEED to be perfect, they are usually to crazy to realize there is anything wrong with them at all...yes, speaking of myself here!

My heart is racing...YES, I really do need a life, but I think the simple, yet insanely busy, life that I lead is good enough for now!

Well, I think I should leave this post for now, because my Little Guy is now disgusted with the amount of ME TIME I have allowed myself to have! Yes, he seems to lead me and not the other way around! And, NO, I am not a pushover, often!

Have a great day!

Maybe you will hear from me again soon? I hope so.

Jamie

Happy Birthday

Happy Birthday to my niece, Breonna. She would have been 7 this year. We only had her for a VERY SHORT time, but I don't think there is any way any of us will ever forget her. This makes me sad, but not as sad as it used to. I am not really sure why. I just know the massive amount of pain has given way to a dull ache when I think of how really horrible it is to lose someone so young, sweet and full of potential. Life never ceases to confuse me, but I try not to let the "hard times" take me under with complete and total waves of sadness. Some days are easier than others.

Hope you are all enjoying your loved ones, here and gone, today.

Jamie

Pee...

Ya, I said pee!

How can I help talking about it with a crazed 3 year old in the house!?!? Really?

Now that we are on the same page, let's move forward, shall we?

On peeing in the bathtub...A few days ago, Ponch ever so kindly let Meeeeema get into the tub with her. Meeeeema, the crazed 3 year old, can not stand for anyone else to be in the bathroom, let alone the tub, without her. Anyway, she weaseled her way in and was allowed to take a bath with her sister. Ponch was reluctant, to say the least, but let her anyway. Boy was Ponch ever less than thrilled when Meeeeema proclaimed, "I just peed in the bathtub!" Ponch said, "you don't pee in the tub! I am in here too!" Meeeeema looked curtly and said, "Oh, well, I peed by me, not you!"

Dear Lord, what could be better than that?

Well, there is just ooooooooone more thing...ugh!

Last night my husband and I were both ready for bed by 9:30. Meeeeema, was the only kid not in bed yet and she is still sleeping in ours more often than not, so that should set the stage. Just turning 3 in December, she is not night potty trained, so she always has a diaper on. Well, somehow, neither one of us thought to put a diaper on her last night and neither realized it. Sooooo, at roughly 12:45, I jumped out of bed (which if you have seen my ever enlarging mid-section lately, you know I don't jump often!) and started yelling for him to get her up, so she wouldn't keep peeing all over my bed! BLAH! Yes, folks, I had pee all over the back of my pajama shirt, pants and bed! I was just sooooo enthused about messing with all of that at such a "decent" hour! So, I took the sheet off and took care of the spot and then tried my best to get some sleep! Needless to say, I don't think I will be forgetting her diaper any time soon! :)

ADHD? I think so!

I think I have severe Society Induced ADHD! Moms are expected to be able to keep up with EVERYTHING! I am not always that great at it, so I start something, shift gears, make a wrong turn and finally come back around to finish that load of laundry I put in two hours ago!

Blah........................!!!

I know I don't write as much as I should. I think it is starting to pile up on me, mentally! I am feeling better now, but was COMPLETELY freaking out this morning! I had a huge realization that another child, especially child number 8, will be like adding a giant wedge to my husband's and my relationship! The biggest wedge now is currently 3 and sleeps right in between us. I have been sick for what feels like forever. I was hot and cold and achy and feeling half dead. I also felt like I was sleeping alone...my partner on the other side of the 3 year old, which feels like a lifetime away. I know who created the monster. I know she would not sleep with us, if WE/ME got her out of our bed. I want her out. She is a conniver. She asks if I want her to sleep in her bed, so the baby can sleep where she sleeps. I tell her there is not a baby here to sleep in her "spot" and that she has to be a big girl, but that doesn't help. I/WE have even tried to get her to sleep with her sisters, thinking that would make her more secure...nope! Suddenly, she can't even turn on the bathroom light and go to the bathroom alone anymore! I could cry! I reallllly could cry! I didn't want to be pregnant, so feeling alone and lonely is not a good way to spend these next few months. It is really wearing on my sanity...the thin thread I have left.

I don't really know what else to say. I can't take a whole lot more of the way I have been feeling..starting to feel serious cabin fever and being sick means keeping to myself, so as not to share tons of germs...I feel like I am fighting a losing battle...barely treading water! Good thing I am stubborn, or I would have folded a loooong time ago!

I hope you are all doing well...someone has to be, right?