A friend brought to my attention that I have been quiet lately, so LOOK OUT LADIES, here I come! Back on the scene with a fresh dose of "what the hell was that?!?"

The scene begins with two little bitty girls in the shower. One takes a bath in her baby bath tub, because it fills up with water and she can sit in it like a big girl and the other little big girl sits in her tub ring and takes a shower. Mommy is a freak, so they are taking a bath together without sharing water! Got it? Ok, let's move on...

Oh, no, let's back track for just a minute.

My friend's mom J knocks right before I put the two in the shower and I spin Meeeeema around, butt out, to greet J. She made some comment about not really needing to see that so early, or something. She proceeds to come in and see my half way remodeled cabinets and we talk a little while I put the two girls in their places.

Boog plays quietly and Meeeeema freaks out, because she has been sick and is in NO MOOD for the shower! I put her in anyway, because I am hoping to loosen up some of the junk that is in her poor little head. When the shower is over for Meeeeema, I pick her up and get ready to run her into my bedroom, so I can throw and diaper on her and stick her in the car seat, while I go back and get Boog. It really is a fool proof plan. My house in no bigger than a Cracker Jack box and my bedroom is just four feet from the bathroom, so I can and do do this with no trouble all of the time. Not today though! Why the hell would things run smoothly? I was up more than not last night with a miserable baby! I am exhausted, grouchy and just plain tired of things running amuck, rather than running smoothly!!! Anyway, as soon as I get Meeeeema out, Boog starts freaking out and screaming about NOTHING! I look at J and express my concern that I might truly have to beat Boog today and on that note J says she will leave, so I can get back to that thought, after having tried to talk nicely to Boog to help calm her down, while I was putting Meeeeema's diaper on.

I ready myself to deal with the situation and make my way into the bathroom. I am pretty clear with Boog on how this is all going down. During my explanation of expectations, Boog is screaming her guts out!!! No big deal! I love my life, right? I get very tired of being tired, but today all of the big kids have dentist appts. and I have to take them, so we have to keep moving in the right direction, even if it kills us!

By the time I get Boog out of the shower and into my room for a diaper, she is calm and I don't know where her bi-polar counter part even went. Hey, it works for me!

As I dress her, I hear her say, "ow" and ask what hurts. Funny response, really.

She says, "OW, bom, you hurt by tock," through her snot filled sinuses!

I say, "how did I hurt your sock?"

Again on the other foot, she says, "ow, bom, you hurt by tock!"

Then, I go on to her shirt.

She says, "ow, bom, you hurt by tirt!"

I say, "how did I hurt your shirt?"

I guess the moral of this whole drawn out story is that the "experts" say small children can't communicate, but I say they are wrong! In the strangest, most round about way, my two year old told me that she has body aches from the dreadful cold she has been suffering from, so there! And, if that is not what she was really trying to tell me and her socks were really screaming in pain, then, well... You tell me, because I have nothing left to say!