Picture Blog

Well Marcia, you win. I started a pic. blog. I don't know if it will interest anyone, because I splatter my pictures from near to far, but I did it! It is at:

http://mommabpicoblog.blogspot.com/

I Am Torn!

Right now, I am writing a letter to my brother, in prison, and I just feel torn! I am mostly torn between things like whether or not to drink chai or water, whether or not to go for another slice of pizza, or even whether or not to take a shower before noon, but not today! I know the list sounds pathetic, huh? I guess after telling you how I normally feel I had better have something good, huh? I just feel torn about the way I spend my days, because he does not have a choice as to how he spends his! I feel torn about what I am doing with my life and my time, because he has his life all mapped out before him! I feel torn about not spending enough time with grandma, because he does not get to see her. The ride is too much for her. I feel torn about not going to the cemtery like I should, because he does not get to mourn the loss of loved ones! He can not even show emotion, or creepy people in there might view him as weak. It pisses me off. I feel torn! Damn it!

Marcia, Oh Marcia!

Marcia, dearest Marcia, you simply must come back!

I am lonely without your blogs to read!

I have not seen a well made donation to charity in ages!!!

I must view a Marcia blog soon, or my brain might really explode!

Please, please, please come back!

I Went To Visit My Friend And Her Mother, And

I just got back from a visit with my friend and her sick mother, and she is terminal.

I just got back from a visit with my friend and her sick mother, and we had a nice visit.

I just got back from a visit with my friend and her sick mother, and I was sad.

I just got back from a visit with my friend and her sick mother, and she was frustrated.

I just got back from a visit with my friend and her sick mother, and she was worried about her kids.

I just got back from a visit with my friend and her sick mother, and I wish her pain was gone.

I just got back from a visit with my friend and her sick mother, and I got her to laugh.

I just got back from a visit with my friend and her sick mother, and I feel for my friend.

I just got back from a visit with my friend and her sick mother, and I asked her to make sure and give my mom and grandpa a kiss and hug from me, when she gets there.

I just got back from a visit with my friend and her sick mother, and I am glad I went!

Queen of the Bleach Wipes and Disinfectant Spray

As of 6:15 a.m., I am crowning myself the new queen of the bleach wipes and disinfectant spray! Of course, I am out of Lysol, so I can not really claim to be the queen of that, but you can believe I was diligently spraying every light switch and faucet and door handle and toilet lid that I could, while I did have it! I am so sick of puke! (sorry, not very big on being proper or appropriate!)

Oh, back to the reason for the 6:15 coronation...

I was startled out of a new fallen sleep by the sound of a short person throwing up all over her crib! If there is a better way to start your day, I would sure like to know what that is! Maybe I can try it tomorrow! Anyway, since one year old Meeeeema sleeps with me, I could not just jump up and put Boog's head in the toilet, so I yell for S, who is as deaf as, well, a 900 year old man! And, he just yells back, rather than making any sort of haste! I was getting more and more irritated and just then he comes in to "save the day." I am thinking he can get her to the toilet while I do something safe with Meeeeema. Nice try! That man's quick fix is to set Boog down and tell her to go throw up on the potty. Great! Thanks for all your help! She could have climbed out of the crib and set herself down on the floor to puke everywhere, while walking to the toilet! Jeez!

Either way, she made it! She finished her business and then he put her in the shower to rinse away all traces of nastiness. While he did this, I got the joy of cleaning up all of the TRACES she left along the path from the crib to the toilet! UGH!

I am the Queen!(of all things disgusting!)

Oh, I forgot to mention that last night Meeeeema pooped to her shoulders, which tells me she is probably sick too! Anyway, she was in the high chair when she did it. I was throwing her in the shower and asked him to take care of the poop laundry. I told him there was poop on the high chair padding. I took care of her and went on about my business of getting ready to go to the gym, because Meeeema seemed to be fine after her episode. This morning, as I walked into the kitchen, I got another whiff of the most disgusting smell. I looked up and saw the damned padding still in the high chair! Are you kidding me? So, I proceeded to have an argument with 900 year old deaf guy about how I told him that needed to be washed too!

I quit!

I quit!

I am on strike!

No, I take it back!

The laundry is already starting to stink! I can't do it fast enough, because when one puke load is finished, I am hit with another kid load that has some other sort of nastiness on it!

Old Note To A Friend. Feel Free To Laugh At My Misfortune!

This is me being calm in spite of kid number 2 our of 329084902384 being sick and throwing up all over my house!

I was asked for an address, so I started searching through my folder that contains important email and a lot of them are from shortly after my mom died. I found one that is rather comical and I thought I could share it, since it seems I will be washing and rewashing many of the items in my house until the stomach flu passes on to another location! I will certainly fall short on blogging time!!!

Have a great, puke free day!



After they ate and we got dressed, I decided to go check on my mom's cat. I felt so sad for her, when I got there. She was sitting by the canned food and just crying. She was hungry and could not figure out why noone was there to feed her. I did not like the way that made me feel, so I called grandma and asked her if she would mind my bringing her in to her house. She is not supposed to have two animals and already has a little dog, but she said it would be ok. My allergies keep me from having cats. So, I thought I would quickly get her loaded up and leave. HA!!! I wanted to leave the cat for dead by the time I was done! She is not a bad cat, but she would not let me pick her up. She kept trying to scratch me. The only cat carrier looked like it had been sitting outside since the 70's and it was full of landscaping bricks?!? Don't ask, I don't know! Anyway, I emptied it and went back into the house to try and put the cat in it. By the third time I had tried this I was ready to scream! I finally opened a can of cat food and put it in the cage. You know that that damned cat just tried to pull the food forward and eat it with her butt hanging out of the cage!?!?!? I was soooo mad. I got her back out and pushed the food to the back and then I let her try and get it again. Ok, so, she's in. Great, right? Not when I realize that the cage latch is broken! I hauled her out to the van and put her in with the door up against the seat. That seemed to work okay.

With the feeling of accomplishment, finally, I decided that I would go back and get the plants that I told grandma I would bring to her house--might as well only make one trip! I also brought the rest of a ham for her, because I thought she might like to have it. We had been sending food to my mom's, when we knew someone would be there to eat it, but otherwise everyone was bringing it to our house. We have a whole other ham to eat still. The one I sent with her was really good and cooked in pineapple, which made her day--kind of grosses me out to eat fruit and meat together, but that is just me. Anyway, I also had all the cats food, which was in one of those cat food keepers and it must have been most of a 20lb bag, because it was really pretty heavy. And, I grabbed the litter, but not the litter pan. I am pretty sure grandma has one and I can't touch it anyway.

When we got to grandma's complex, I realized that they had resurfaced the drive, so we could not get in. Grandma lives in the second building over, so I am really in for a treat. Gee, I can hardly wait! I get out and get the dumb cat to get out. She is not agreeing with any of what is going on! She is stressed and scared and just plain mad! I know exactly where she is coming from, because about 2 miles out of GC she got out of the cage and decided to try and get in the front seat--probably smelled the ham. I kept trying to swat her back. I called Scott, because I decided that I wanted to make sure someone knew I was about to freak out! He, of course, laughed at me!! Good times!!!!! Anyway, back to the driveway, I got the cat out and grandma came up the sidewalk telling me to drive around to the back yard. I threw the cat back in the van and went around. This proved much easier. Thank God! Something about today seemed easy!

I pulled the cat out first, again, and she started scratching and biting me! Ok, so now, I am deciding where and how she would like my foot. I was cussing and yelling and I just let her go. I bet she is wishing she had not made such a scene, as of right now, because it is raining and she is OUTSIDE! Bad choices will get you know where Miss Kitty! Her name is Sadie, but by now I am thinking Satan is more appropriate! We decided that she would get cold or hungry and she would bring her butt back to grandma's. I hope so anyway. She is really not an outside cat. I feel quite sorry for her, in spite of wanting to choke her!

I went ahead and unloaded everything else. Noah, who would not put clothes on today, ran into grandma's and begged to stay. She decided that would be ok. I am glad, because I needed to do other things and he was in his boxers! No kidding! No shoes, no shirt, no shorts, no nothing, but the boxers, which he is quite fond of! He has been missing grandma and he really does not understand about my mom--not bad, but it is confusing for all of them--so him wanting to cling to grandma does not surprise me. Blake wanted to go to, but he is not very big on listening to her, so she can't handle him for very long. Noah will end up being there for 4 hours, so there was no way she would take both. And, grandma is lonelier than ever, so the company will help her too. She does not say much, but my mom pretty much took her everywhere. I guess you know what that means--I will have to make sure I keep a better eye on here. Man, please help me figure out when I will have time for me!?!?!? I guess I will just have to make it work. I almost wish I had room for her here, but her dog pees everywhere and I would kill her for that! She is not trained and that is a really bad thing!!!

Early Gift!

Woo Hoo! I got the greatest EARLY birthday present last night!

When P of 3DNP met me at the gym last night, she had a little something up her sleeve! I was already in a strange state of mind, due to some bad news she had just given me on the phone, so I was rather weepy when she came to my car door and gave me this wonderful, thoughtful, exciting new bag with my initials on it! It is pretty darned slick!

I know what you are thinking! If you are of sound mind, you are thinking that I am awfully excited over a bag, but if you read the post about the all school field trip that my family went on, then you know that the BAD PEOPLE stole my bag, when the bus was parked in SECURED PARKING! I was so mad for too long! My wonderful friend did her best to replace the bag I lost and she did a GREAAAAAT job of it!

Thank you!

Thank you!

Thank you!

The Garden Is Planted! Que The Singing Angels!

I planted my garden!

I planted my garden!

I planted my garden!

I am so excited! I did not plan a traditional family day, like I should have, so we just had the Easter egg hunt with some friends that we consider family and then we came home to eat our ham and potatoes and green beans with bacon and pepper in them! The green beans remind me of the way we make our garden green beans, so it really geared me up to go out and plant the garden!

I had already broken up the ground on Saturday. We do not have the pleasure of using a tiller, so I broke up the ground with a 4-tine twistable tilling device! UGH! There is nothing less fun that twisting your arms over and over and over again! On the upside, I think my bustline just magically got perkier! HA! Anyway, I took the tilling device out to the garden yesterday, in hopes of breaking up my of the yard, so as to increase the size of the garden, because I share "the fruits of my labor" with my neighbor, so he said I could break up some of his yard! He just doesn't want to mow! I got lucky and my husband broke up the sod! I did some of that yesterday and it was AWFUL! Needless to say, I have woke up these last two mornings feeling I have been hit by a truck! After all this yapping, all I really wanted to say is that my garden is now about 1 1/2 - 2 feet longer than it was last year. It is probably 8 x 12, or something like that.

I strategically placed my rows so as to maximize the amount of goodies I could plant! I put a row of yellow onions in and then green beans, because onions do not require much top space. Then, I put in a row of radishes, I think, and more green beans, followed by a row of carrots and, you guessed it, more green beans! I put in a row of red onions, packed tightly in place, because if all works according to plan, I will pull about half for green onions and then I will let the rest grow into bulb onions! Peppers, and more red onions, followed by a row of peas, finished out the items that I planted in seed form! Well, onions are not from seeds, but I am sure you already know that! Anyway, I have more room and more to plant, but there a 2-3 foot area that is just waiting for tomato plants and some banana peppers and maybe even some really mean, spicy peppers for my neighbor! The end of my garden has 12 mounds of potatos! I made a little area for an "herb garden" that has cilantro, parsley, sweet basil and something else, but for the life of me, I can not remember it! And, finally, I put cucumber seeds in a little patch at the other end of the garden. We will see if I get anything out of that mess! Last year, I was not very diligent with keeping the cucumber watered, so I got 3 the entire season! HA! Crazy, right!?

So, here is the fun part! I let B, Bucko, Ponch, Boog and Z all "help" me! It was GREAT! Nice try! There really is nothing great about having to force your kids to help, but I sure did follow through with it! Even when it meant hunting them down after they had wandered off into the house! I found two of them sitting at the computer! UGH! Steam was just a-rollin! I did not have much for them to do, but they were helping anyway! Everyone eats out of that garden and everyone was going to help, even if it killed ME! Almost! The one thing I should mention is that the little boys really do like to help plant seeds. As far as that goes, Z liked helping make rows with the hoe, but his rows were more crooked than mine and about 6 inches deep! I had him make potato hills instead. I gave him a certain amount of room, in which he could plant, and he used about half of that! I tried to get him to spread things out, but... I guess we will have close knit potatos this year!

Anyway, all in all, and a whole lot of typing later, I am so excited about having my garden planted! I would have taken a picture, but I assure you, there is nothing to see----yet!

Grouchy Momma B!!!

I was in a bad mood when my husband came home today. He knew he would be leaving again, right away in fact, so he thought he should try and cheer me up really quickly, so he came out into the living room in my pajamas!


Tell me you would not have laughed???

Getting Tired of This!

So, pretty much everyone who reads my blog knows that my mom died of cancer. I don't like it, but I am able to function through it. Now, this is what is really getting on my nerves, my grandma's brother C was diagnosed with prostate cancer. He is optimistic that it can be fixed, because their brother J has had and made it through the same thing. This is all well and good, right? Sure.

My mad-texting granny sent me a message this morning saying that her brother J has bone cancer now! I can not believe the timing on this! My Uncle C was really confident and now his hopes will be smashed and my Uncle J probably does not get any good news from here on out! I know that is not a rosy outlook, but I find that honesty is better than lying to myself and others, in most cases!

I also want to convey to everyone that I do not pray for magic, except for in Stellan's case and then I prayed that God would keep him here (because babies are not meant to be lost, in my eyes), but I do pray that God will do the right thing for the person and family involved. I also pray that God will comfort everyone involved and let them see the reasons that death is ok for their loved one. When mom died, I was sure that I would miss her, but that if she was only going to be alive the way she had been, I was ok with her dying. She had to go or be a sad shell of who she was and who she wanted to be and that was not ok with me.

I am just mad! Confused! Sad! HUMAN!

Admission of Guilt

How wrong is it to admit using a yoga dvd that came from McDonald's, the king of all fattening meals?




That's what I thought.



So, let's just go ahead and ignore the last blog that I posted then, k?



Nothing like ratting myself out!



In my defense, I did have to eat a salad to get the dvd!



Ok, ok, you're right! It doesn't count, because it was a McDonald's email!!!



Back to square one...



Is it wrong to admit using a yoga dvd that came from McDonald's? :)

To Yoga, Or Not To Yoga?

To yoga, or not to yoga is certainly the question! I went with P and Snot Head, aka my little sister, to a half hour yoga class at our gym. I have done the 15 minute McDonald's yoga work out at home before and thought I would like to try this class.

Did I mention that I did the McD's yoga work out in the privacy of my own home?

Did I mention that I am extremely under coordinated?

Did I mention that I have a mild case of laughing out loud in uncomfortable situations?

Did I also mention that I want to strangle my own children for the very same behavior?

Surely I mentioned these things to my sister and friend before dragging off to a yoga class. Ha! Sure I did!

Anyway, I got to the gym a few minutes early and met up with P, who borrowed one of the yoga mats from my house. She and I carried in the mats, what felt like 9304834085 water bottles and our change of shoes. I signed in quickly and ran off to get my mat in place before the whole back row of the classroom was full! I unrolled my mat before I ran to the bathroom and as I was flinging my mat out, the crochet hook that I thought was lost forever came flying out across the classroom! It was strange, embarrassing and funny all at the same time!

I came back from the bathroom to find that the class was starting without me. I tried to sneak in and be unnoticed, but some how that is nearly impossible when you are me! I am always making unnecessary noise, or laughing, or doing something to get into trouble! The class was just a series of stretches, but not the kind of stretches I do before I get on the treadmill. No, not at all! I can say that some of those stretches left me wondering if my foot was really going to get stuck by my opposite wrist! NO KIDDING!

So, you may be wondering if it worked??? I would have to say YES! I am in pain sitting at my computer desk! I have the worst case of SCREAMING ABS that I think I have ever experienced! Also, for some reason the palms of my hands have been crying in pain all morning long!

Plans for next week?

I plan to not find a crochet hook lodged anywhere in my mat! I plan not to lay on the mat and laugh, more than maybe twice during the half hour class and I plan to be able to sit upright the next day without being able to hear my torso screaming in pain! Now, we'll have to see if it works that way!

Any gamblers?

I Mailed The Lady In My Computer Some Chai!

I mailed the lady in my computer some chai and it did not land me in the Pokey! I am impressed!!! On a whim one day last week I sent Ant Knit a packet of my favorite chai! I thought for a second that I might be considered to be a terrorist of the sugariest kind, because the packet of chai is noticeably granular and shifts a little in the envelope, but when noone came to arrest me, I was pleasantly surprised! I was even more pleasantly surprised when I got a text from her saying that she received my little (tiny) gift!

So, for public record, I am the Chai Master and don't you forget it!

Stalking Me Again, Jane?

Ha! I just found out yesterday that a lady I used to work with has been secretly reading my blog, so I thought I would mess with her head a bit and make the title of my blog freak her out!

Well, did it work? Jaaaaaaaane! Yoohoo!?! Do you read me loud and clear?

Just kidding! Read away! I even love that you said reading this makes you feel closer to me! However, I think it is sick that we live three blocks apart and rarely ever see each other! I think it is that rotten job of yours! Ha! Sorry to mess with your head, but the devil made me do it! And, it is probably not the worst thing the devil has made me do this week, but it might be the funniest!

I miss you! I love you!

This Is My Spin...

This is my spin on a piece that I read on Wendi Aarons blog. I am BY NO MEANS trying to steal her work or ideas! I just happened to read her blog entry and it got me thinking about what my house is like from a more theatrical stand point.

My home is like a theater rehearsal. Every day is just another practice. The kids in the house are diligently practicing their roles, hoping to gain enough knowledge to master the role and, one day, go out on their own to star in bigger and better productions that life has to hold for them.

Sometimes there is drama.

Other times, the mood is purely comedic.

There is not usually much need for make-up, thank God, because no one here knows how to apply it anyway! The countless wardrobe changes absolutely make up for the lack of make-up!

As for scenery, it is as ever-changing as the costumes! The on-going remodeling projects, along with the endless piles of laundry stacked on the back of the couch, which helps to facilitate the countless wardrobe changes through out the day, and the constant placement and replacement of children's toys make for interesting props in this play we call life!

The plot varies from one day to the next, but carries the same general idea, which is love, life and well-being.

We, the actors in this so-called play, strive to perfect our roles, but we know that the part of parent is especially hard to master, so we practice and practice some more.

There is no time to falter and no room for failure, so forge ahead we must!

It is Broadway or bust!






Maybe it is a little goofy, but I find that I am a little less crazy, if since I have started letting the thoughts from my head spill onto the pages of my notebook!

Have a great day!

Oh, The Thinks I Can Think!

Ok, so I wrote a few things down yesterday and I thought maybe I would share them? I don't make any claims of being a writer, but I do enjoy it.



I Miss My MOM!


I miss my mom!

Sometimes I cry.

I miss my mom!

Why did she die?

I miss my mom!

Miss her smile.

I miss my mom!

All the while,

I miss my mom!

Not her pain!

I'll miss my mom,

til we meet again!



Untitled


Where did you go?

Where have you been?

At Heaven's gate, we'll meet again?

Not today though.

No, not now.

But some day as this world spins round,

My heart will stop.

Just one last beat.

And then again, you and I will meet!

Cunningham Children's Home

Over the weekend, our Sunday School confirmation group went to the Cunningham Children's Home for their annual confirmation class "field trip" day.

It was an experience unlike any that I have ever been through before. I felt sad throughout most of the day. I was just sad to know that kids are without a "mom and dad" home. Oh, don't get me wrong, I am a "mom only" home kid and that is fine, but the point is that it drives me crazy that so many people have kids and don't stick by them. Kids need parents! Kids need support! Kids need guidance! I know life is not perfect and I also know that it is wonderful that there is a home with loving staff that really do their best to become the "parental influence" for these kids. It still makes me sad.

Being sad was not to be the point of the blog, so on with it already!

I wanted to take a minute to personally blog a thank you to all of my hat making cohorts! I thought it would be nice to make hats for all of the kids who live at the home and to also make hats for all of the kids who attend the school. I mentioned it to my sister. I was attempting to tell her in hopes of her saying that she would help. Well, over the course of our hat making excursion, many other generous souls offered to help as well! My grandma started making hats and my sister's man-friend/fiance' did too! After that, our friends Ant Knit, 3DNP, Kekee, and Life With My 3 Boys all joined in too! I forgot to mention that my 9 year old, Ponch, and my 11 1/2 year old, Z, also pitched in!

I think you are all wonderful and I am so thankful to have you as friends! Thanks for everything!

Ha! IF I was "cool" I would say "you ROCK!"

I am not cool!