Getting Tired of This!

So, pretty much everyone who reads my blog knows that my mom died of cancer. I don't like it, but I am able to function through it. Now, this is what is really getting on my nerves, my grandma's brother C was diagnosed with prostate cancer. He is optimistic that it can be fixed, because their brother J has had and made it through the same thing. This is all well and good, right? Sure.

My mad-texting granny sent me a message this morning saying that her brother J has bone cancer now! I can not believe the timing on this! My Uncle C was really confident and now his hopes will be smashed and my Uncle J probably does not get any good news from here on out! I know that is not a rosy outlook, but I find that honesty is better than lying to myself and others, in most cases!

I also want to convey to everyone that I do not pray for magic, except for in Stellan's case and then I prayed that God would keep him here (because babies are not meant to be lost, in my eyes), but I do pray that God will do the right thing for the person and family involved. I also pray that God will comfort everyone involved and let them see the reasons that death is ok for their loved one. When mom died, I was sure that I would miss her, but that if she was only going to be alive the way she had been, I was ok with her dying. She had to go or be a sad shell of who she was and who she wanted to be and that was not ok with me.

I am just mad! Confused! Sad! HUMAN!