My kid does not ever give me much to go on. She is 9. She does not act like she likes me or others or anything in particular very often. She is very intelligent and extremely hard to deal with. She got an award Monday at school for achievement in all categories. She was happy about that. She can be loving. She can be caring. She can be difficult. She can be crass. And then, there are times when she just goes and does it...
Last night we were sitting on my bed. I was crocheting, which is what I used as my official down time before I go to sleep. I had asked Ponch to help me decorate some of the musical instruments that I am working on for a Sunday school project. Out of nowhere, she sat up and said, "when I grow up, I am going to (pause) recycle and adopt kids. The whole bit." Blown away, and on the verge of tears, I say, "where did all of this come from?" She was so nonchalant and just replied, "well, I am not going to adopt 7 kids. Maybe 3." I had tears spilling down my cheeks, much like the ones I have now. I was so touched. I told her that I always worried that bringing other kids into the lives of the ones we already had might screw up their lives in some way. She was so puzzled. She simply could not figure out why I would feel that way.
I could actually hear the angels sing.
Doing the right thing felt like the right thing last night, for real!
Yes, I hold on to small things, especially with her, because she gives so little.